The Day I Went to Pakistan

PHOTO UPDATE:
Some (about half) of my missing photos have been recovered at a data recovery center, and I am putting them into the previous blog posts now.

First off, two days ago was treated as a legitimate religious pilgrim. Ok, maybe not completely legit, but I did meet some real, nice friends at the holiest place of the Sikh religion, The Golden Temple in Amritsar. My new friends first greeted me by laughing at me and the makeshift scarf I had wrapped around my head, and after a bit of chatting and the usual "look who I saw at the temple today, Mom" photos, I was on my way toward acceptance. After the initial laughter had mostly subsided, they decided it was prudent to rewrap my headdress. With me looking more strange than ever, we went to the pilgrim dining area (FREE FOOD!) where we sat in a huge hall on the floor. Servers--people with giant pots and ladles--walked along the lines and rapidly served us all, spilling the delicious slop on the floor only a little, after which we speedily ate and cleared our plates to make room for the next 250 or so pilgrims waiting outside. A little more chatting here, a little barefoot underground temple exploration there, and I departed my new friends.

The next thing I knew I was in a crowded van heading to the Pakistan border (this was a planned trip by me, contrary to the misleading transition sentence). What awaited me was actually a popular event, for both tourists, Pakistanis, and Indians alike. I approached the border crossing at Attari, India from the Indian side with a mob of Indian natives. At times I was running down the street toward the border (to secure a good vantage point) and at others I was squeezing (pushing, shoving, moshing) through small passages with too many people. The destination was a concrete bandstand in sight of the Pakistani gates and the Pakistani bandstands on the side opposite. The crowds filled in the stands on both sides, as the sun approached the horizon over Pakistan.


The events which unfolded before me were strange, unusual, bizarre, funny, adjective, adjective, adjective. The border patrols, soldiers of each respected country, gathered together before an audience of their countries' natives to hold competitions of a "choose an adjective above" nature. Maybe they were ceremonious as opposed to competitive, but each country's people tried to outdo the other's.

Competition One: Flag Run

• Women, run toward the gate carrying your country's flag
• Then, run back the other way

Competition Two: Dance Contest

• Play music on loudspeakers to drown out the music on the other side of the border
• People, dance like you're at a club
• More fun means better country
  

Competition Three: Yelling Contest

• Soldier, yell as long and as loud as you can into a microphone
• Try to yell better than the yelling person in the other country
• Audience, yell louder than the other audience, "Long live Hindustan!!!"
  

Competition Four: High Kick Contest

• Soldier, march to the border using very spastic, highly (barely) controlled movements
• High kick while facing the other country's soldiers; hit your face if you can
• Grunt like you mean it

Then they lowered the flags and everyone went home. I am very happy to see that the India-Pakistan conflict has come to this, coordinating an over the top, campy border closing show, where people with big guns show off to other people with big guns.