All Thai Songs Considered Blow

Thai music is mostly crap. Bold, but I think true. Every background beat may as well have been created by one of those keyboards which generate a generic version of a type of music, type being "Crappy Love Song" or "Easy Listening" if the song is particularly normal. Every song is slow and boring, with an uninspired and repetitive melody. If you add a mediocre voice and lyrics which are found literally in EVERY SINGLE other song, you get: a Thai song.

Themes of Thai songs are limited to:

• "Gosh, I love you"
• "I will flirt with you because I love you"
• "We just met and I love you"
• "You look good so I love you"
• "I cannot believe you love her and not me"
• "You Bastard! I loved you and you cheated on me"
• "You Bastard! I loved you and you're dating someone else when I was here standing in the shadows just watching you"
• "Don't you flirt with her because I love you and I am murderously jealous"
• "I will kill you if you steal my man"
• "I love you because you are attractive, and that's what love means to me"

Every song, I guarantee, I mean seriously (well as serious as I can get without putting my life on the line) guarantee, has the words "ruk tur"--"I love you"--in it. No joke. Mai phuut len.



Popular Western songs here in Thailand include "My Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion and "Hero" by Mariah Carey. Bullocks of the non-dog variety for those inclined to British English. These songs are so popular that of 7 songs sung at talent contest, these two were each repeated. They made up more than 50% of the already pathetic show. I find it hard to say this, but Rahul, if you are reading, I cannot say your taste in music is elementary anymore. There, I said it. I played a Beatles song in class today and was shocked by the fact that no one knew who The Beatles were. They asked, "Is he a singer?" I knew Thai children were sort of... ahem... but really? Really?!

A student singing "Hero"

I came here excited to learn about Asian music and find new artists from this end of the world. I am severely disappointed and emphatically recommend that no one ever listens to the bulk of Thai music for musical enjoyment. Rather, giggle at the ridiculousness of the dancing and the inability of Thai stars to show emotions on their faces, at least ones that don't look forced or only involve their eyes.

That all said, if you know of good Thai music, please send it to me or post a link in the comment box. I would like to be proven wrong here.

Typical video
Typical again
Upbeat with great dancing
Not even sure, but there's speak-singing