Friday, May 7, 2010

Profile of an Indian Man, Age 20-26 (part 1)

This is a generalization about Indian guys gathered from first-hand experience and the stories of other travelers in India. It is meant as a humorous examination of similar aged men from another culture.



Who is he:

  • Usually clean cut
  • Height around 5' 10"
  • Typically still in school, studying law with a business focus or going for an MBA
  • Likes to party -- drinks liquor like a champ and smokes hashish like he grows the shit
  • Hates to party -- it's below him and his "caste" (although no Indian will admit that caste system still exists in its own way)
  • Very forward -- gets to the points, asks pertinent questions, says what's on his mind
  • Understands the guest-host relationship a little too well
  • Seems to be entering puberty, mentally, though he is physically an adult

Interests:

  • Hookers, and their cost -- Westerners, he rationalizes, only have sex because they can pay for it, as that is the only way. I was asked more than once, "How much do hookers cost?" "Five-fifty, fool! And if yer lucky, four!"
  • Cricket -- there is no game which can match its importance
  • Blow jobs -- "Do westerners really give blow jobs?" This came up every time the conversation had time to move toward sexuality. Indian guys are amazed by/salivate over the exotic oral encounter. They even count "suck" on the same plane of profane as "fuck" and "bitch"
  • Your comfort -- you as a guest cannot be comfortable enough; there is no way. Indian men will pester you until you are paranoid of seeming uncomfortable
  • Denial of the caste system -- "It has been abolished!" "...But why can't you marry that girl who you think is pretty and nice?" "Well, because she is in a lower caste, of course"
  • Marriage and what "Life is all about" -- "Life is all about" the sex you can have when you are married, as was made clear by many
  • Being a puppy! Well, they sometimes act like puppies. They were often seen squirming around, cuddling, and acting fidgety.
  • Enrique Iglesias -- You cannot fathom their love for this man. He. Is. God.

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